It is important for all children to practice accepting when parents say “no”. If this isn’t practiced from a young age then, when a need or desire genuinely can’t be met, it will be a real shock for the child. They are likely to find it difficult to cope with and my not be able to why on this occasion, “no” actually meant “no”.
We always recommend that children frequently practice accepting when things are not available. (There are many skills that need to be in place before this – if you would like to know more about these, let us know).
The more this skill is practiced the easier it will be on those days, for example, when the child sees an ice cream van but you left your money at home.
It may sound like a negative thing to practice, but it can be done in many fun situations. The first step in teaching this is to say no to something, and immediately something that they prefer – they children then have absolutely no problem with items being denied! As they learn, different items are offered as alternatives, until they don’t need to be offered at all (again, for more information, get in touch).
The important thing, though is that if you have said “no” (or any other language meaning the same thing) to stick to it.
If a child hears “no”, makes a fuss, and then are told yes, they will learn that as long as they make that fuss, they will be told yes.
If you have any questions about how to tackle this, please do ask http://earlyactionforautism.co.uk/contact/